Both Ends

Happy November. I don't particularly care for November. The starting the car 10 minutes before I have to leave. The taking the shoes off before I go to my basement suite. The heavy coats. The cranky drivers. The freezing cold bedroom. The erections. It's just an all around bad wintery scene. It also means there's still a month and a half of school, winter is about to kick into high gear, and it's two months until Christmas can take the sting of winter out.

Today I wondered if I should write this post, or weather I should think of a way to end world hunger. Frankly, the latter seemed more difficult, so welcome to the blissful world of the attention defecit.

If you're reading this on company time, congratulations on beating the system. If you're not reading this on company time, you really need to find a job where they pay you to do this sort of thing.

By the way, if any of you happen to notice a spelling or punctuation error in my posts, as so many of you seem to do and point out, please follow this process:
1.) Research the Native American method for sending smoke signals.
2.) Set your couch on fire.
3.) Stand on your roof and use one of your dress shirts to control the signal as it comes out of the chimney.

OK, so this bird flu has me worried. I already circle parking lots just to find a space that isn't directly under a tree and is located in what appears to be a crapping-free zone. The problem with this is, is that if these birds have this flu, they'll be firing from both ends. There aren't enough squeegees in the world for that.

My solution is to hope that global warming kills off the birds, thus solving the problem. Classic example of two wrongs making a right. With any luck, someday birds will just burst into flames during mid-flight. But until that joyous day, I'm thinking of just moving to Florida instead. I'm no ornothologist, but I'm pretty sure that birds don't like hurricanes.

Speaking of which, that's what angres me about the media. They can never focus on the posative. Just once I'd like to hear on a news show: "Hurricane Wilma has battered Florida unmercilessly, but on the bright side, nothing has crapped on our Eyewitness News Van for hours! Back to you, Bob."

Anyways, if you're still reading, you're probably going to hell. But since you're condemned already, if you haven't already done so, check out my Halloween pics on the post below this.

B.a.D